


Every Imperfection

by threeboldladies



Category: The Bold Type
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-18
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-07-13 23:03:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 7,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16027829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/threeboldladies/pseuds/threeboldladies
Summary: Altered Kadena storyline. Kat's insecurities about a scar, and her childhood health struggles.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Thanks for the great feedback on my last piece! I loved writing this one, I definitely have a special connection to the story. Make sure to follow my tumblr @threeboldladies, I take requests!

Kat, Sutton, and Jane sit together in their favorite corner booth of their favorite brunch place, day drunk on mimosas and good company. 

“Ok so how many dates have you two been on?” Jane questions Kat

“Two I guess technically, but it feels like more” Kat responds, always a bit shy when talking about Adena

“Has the deed been done?” Sutton questions with a smirk 

Kat looks away embarrassed “I mean we’ve kissed...but I just don’t...taking off my clothes…” she trails off 

“Babe you know she won’t care.” Jane says squeezing her hand 

“Yeah it’s a part of you, and I’m pretty sure Adena wants to know every part of you” Sutton says with a smile grabbing her other hand 

“What if it makes things weird? You know with the last guy…” Kat starts 

“That was the last guy” Sutton cuts in “this is different” 

“Adena is crazy about you, and is also so understanding. I know you don’t like to be vulnerable, but if you want this to be something, you’re going to have to get over this” Jane says 

“I know” Kat says, voice wavering “It’s just...a lot”

 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - 

“You’re so beautiful” Adena smiles against Kat’s lips

The two of them found a comfortable rhythm on Adena’s couch, learning each other's bodies, and laying soft kisses on each others lips. Adena reacher her hand to the hem of Kat’s shirt, and goes to take it off. Kat instinctively reaches to grab Adena’s wrist, and looks her in the eyes, filled with fear. 

“What is it?” Adena asks concerned 

“I...I” Kat stutters 

“We don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with” Adena says kindly, grabbing her hands  
“It’s not that...I mean I… I want to” Kat says

Adena tries to find her eyes, the beautiful eyes she cares for so deeply, eyes that are usually so confident.

“Kat...talk to me” Adena says, masking her worry 

“I have this…” Kat starts, hesitating 

“This?” Adena questions 

“This scar” Kat says looking down 

“Baby” Adena says relieved. She grabs Kat’s face in her hands “I don’t care” she says with a smile 

“The last person I was with...he...it made him really uncomfortable” Kat says embarrassed 

“Kat, I don’t care. I care for you deeply, no scar would ever change that. Can I ask what happened?” she says 

“I had open heart surgery when I was a kid” Kat says, still unable to maintain eye contact 

Adena is clearly surprised that this beautiful, bubbly woman she knows has gone through something like that.

“Wow...I had no idea” Adena says 

“I mean...how would you” Kat responds 

“Is everything ok now” Adena questions 

“I have regular check ups, and things like that, but I haven’t had many complications” Kat says 

Adena grabs her hands, and finally Kat looks her in the eyes. Adena puts a hand on her cheek, running her thumb along Kat’s cheek. 

“This means you can’t break my heart” Kat jokes with a smile, a stray tear running down her face 

Adena wipes it away, and smiles “I do not intend on ever doing that” 

Kat leans in, and kisses her softly. Adena grabs her face, pulling her in, deepening the kiss. Kat starts to lean back on the couch, Adena following on top of her. Kat takes a deep breath before reaching for the top button of her shirt. 

“Are you sure?” Adena questions “We don’t have to”

“I’m...I’m sure” Kat says, undoing more buttons. 

When her shirt falls around her, she takes in a nervous breath. She avoids eye contact, embarassed of the dark scar running down her chest, still puckered at the service. Adena takes in her woman before her, shy, nervous, unlike her normal self. 

“Kat look at me” Adena says 

Kat looks up, tears welling in her eyes. She has never seemed so vulnerable. 

“You are so beautiful” Adena smiles grabbing her face, and kissing her softly, feeling Kat exhale beneath her 

Kat nods in response. 

“I don’t care” Adena says, laying kisses down her chest, running hot open lipped pecks over her scar. “You are perfect” She says grabbing Kats hand. 

\- - - - - - - - - - - 

The girls sit at their favorite corner booth, in their favorite brunch place, waiting for Kat to spill. 

“So?” Sutton smirks 

“I did it” Kat smiles 

“And?” Jane adds on the edge of her seat 

“It was...amazing” She says with a grin 

The two girls squeal in response, overjoyed for their friend who deserves the world 

“Mimosas on me ladies!” Sutton chimes


	2. Safe with Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adena digs deeper into Kat's childhood health problems

It had been weeks since Kat quite literally bore her scars to Adena. The whole experience was fiercely vulnerable and had only brought the two closer together. “It’s like a dream” Kat would often tell Jane and Sutton. Although the couple had touched on Kat’s health issues as a child, Adena had always wanted to know more but wasn’t sure how to bring it up. 

One night, Kat and Adena sat on the couch in comfortable silence. Adena was reading, and Kat was browsing Scarlet's twitter on her Ipad. Adena couldn’t help but steal glances at Kat, this beautiful, soft, bubbly woman in front of her. Kat’s brow was furrowed as she focused on the online world. She was wearing a loose tank top, that showed the top of her scar. Adena felt warm knowing Kat was comfortable around her in this way, and couldn’t help the butterflies in the pit of her stomach when she thinks - she trusts me. After a while of lingering eyes, she works up the courage to ask. 

“Hey baby?” Adena questions, setting her book aside, and pulling Kat out of her zone 

“What’s up” Kat says with a smile 

“I have wanted to ask you something for a little while now, and I am not really sure how to do it,” Adena says, looking into Kat’s kind eyes 

“Dena you know you can ask me anything” Kat responds reaching out grabbing her hand 

“You said” Adena starts, lacking her usual confidence, “You said the scar was from heart surgery, and I don’t want to push...I just feel like I want to know every part of you, and your experiences” she feels Kat loosen her grip on her hand, and is worried she upset her

“Yes, I had surgery when I was six ” She says, looking down to their hands 

“Can I ask why?” Adena says, looking to Kat 

“They uh...they put in a device to fix irregularities with my heartbeat” She responds 

“How much to you remember?” Adena asks, moving closer to rub Kat’s arm 

“A lot actually” Kat says looking up. Adena sees that Kat is willing to open up, but is struggling to. 

“Oh yeah? Like what?” she says, trying to convey warmth 

“Lots of little things, like how the hospital smelled, and the quilt the nurses gave me. I remember how much I hated being hooked up to the IV. Oh, and I remember my Kindergarten class sending me cards” Kat feels safe with Adena, and feels herself opening 

“Picturing a little baby Kat in a hospital bed is painful” Adena says, moving even closer, resting up against her 

“It was hard, I won’t lie” Kat says 

“Of course it was” Adena responds quickly. Kat has a habit of trying to downplay her experiences 

“I was there for awhile, and I remember how much I hated the way my parents and family looked at me” Kat says 

“How do you mean?” Adena asks, looking up to Kat 

“Like...like I was broken” 

Adena can’t respond, the words hurting her so deeply 

“They used these soft voices, like if they didn’t talk sweet I would break or something. And they gave me these sad eyes.” Kat says, voice wavering a bit 

“I’m sorry azizam” Adena responds 

“That’s why I was afraid to tell you...to show you. I didn’t want you to treat me differently” Kat says sadly 

“Kat…” Adena starts 

“But you didn’t” Kat cuts in “You didn’t treat me differently. Or see me as damaged goods like people have in the past. You make me feel...safe” 

Adena is taken aback by Kat’s sudden vulnerability, and her heart fills with adoration. All Adena can think to do in the moment is pull Kat in for a smoldering kiss. She pulls away slightly, to look into her eyes. It is all very intimate 

“You are always safe with me” Adena whispers 

Adena hold Kat a little closer that night, and lays watching her sleep a little bit longer. She replays Kat’s words over and over in her mind, and vows to to protect the heart Kat has trusted her to hold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always for the feedback! Follow my tumblr @threeboldladies and give me some prompts! Hope you enjoy this little chapter.


	3. Don't go breaking my heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat has a health scare

“Yeah baby, you like that?” Adena says to the girl beneath her, whose breath has begun to hitch 

“No...Adena” Kat responds out of breath 

“No?” Adena says confused

“My...my chest” Kat says bringing her hand to her heart 

“Kat!” Adena says getting off of her “What do I do?” 

“9..11” Kat mutters before her eyes start to close 

“Kat, baby, no stay with me. Breathe” Adena says through tears. 

 

\- - - - - - - - - - - - 

Kat is asleep in her hospital bed. She is fine. Palpitations are normal with her health history. But Adena can’t stop pacing the hallway outside her room. 

“Adena!” a voice calls out. 

“Sutton” Adena responds, wrapping the girl in a hug. 

“What happened? Is she ok?” Sutton questions 

“She is fine...they said she was just having an irregular heartbeat. They’re going to keep her overnight” Adena says with tears in her eyes 

“This happens Adena,” Sutton says “I know it’s scary but it happens”

“This happens often?” Adena questions 

“Maybe 5 times since I've known her?” Sutton responds 

“We were...I was on top of her....she couldn’t” Adena begins to stutter 

“Hey,” Sutton says putting her hand on Adena’s shoulder “this is not your fault”

“If I hadn’t been so rough maybe…”

“No.” Sutton cuts in “Like I said this happens. This is a part of her. There is nothing you could have or should have done differently” 

“But..”

“No buts” the redhead snaps “let's go see our girl” 

The two sit while Kat sleeps for a while. Adena watches her chest rise and fall, making sure she is safe and peaceful. Seeing Kat in a hospital bed is eating at her. The two had talked about her childhood, the time she spent in the hospital, but Adena could never picture it. This image is now seared in her memory, and it burns. Sutton leaves to get them coffee, and Kat starts to wake. 

“Dena” Kat mumbles 

“I’m right here,” Adena says, standing to be at her side 

“I’m sorry,” Kat says, her voice hoarse 

“For what?” Adena says confused 

“I’m sorry if I scared you. Are you ok?” Kat questions 

“Am I ok?” Adena says with a small laugh 

Kat reaches out her hand, Adena grabs it tentatively, softly. Kat looks up and into her eyes, and her heart breaks. She sees in Adena’s eyes what she saw in her family as a child - Adena is scared to break her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short little chapter, hope you enjoy. I'm going to try and keep this up. Make sure to follow me on tumblr @threeboldladies. I would love prompts and requests. Thank you!


	4. I thought you were different

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat confronts Adena about their change in dynamic

It had been 2 weeks. 2 weeks since Kat’s scare, and 2 weeks since Adena had touched her. It was 2 weeks of “I can’t tonight I’m busy” and “I’m too tired right now”. It was eating away at Kat. The way Adena has looked at her since the hospital made her ache. Adena is afraid to touch Kat, and Kat knows. 

 

The two had settled together on the couch, a documentary droning in the background, and a noticeable divide between the two girls on the couch. Kat misses being touched by Adena, the release sex gives her, but more than that the feeling of closeness it creates. Kat isn’t even paying attention to the movie, and leans over to Adena, placing a kiss on her neck, pulling her body close. Kat grabs Adena by the wrist, moving her hand between her legs.  _ Please _ \- Kat let’s out in a throaty whisper. 

 

“Not now baby, I’m watching this” Adena says, pulling away 

 

“Sorry to be such a distraction,” Kat says, anger seeping through 

 

“Kat?” Adena says confused

 

“I don’t know how much longer I can do this Adena” Kat says storming to her bedroom 

 

Adena follows, concerned about this sudden burst of emotion, so unlike Kat. 

 

“Do what?” Adena questions walking in 

 

“Pretend” Kat responds 

 

“Kat I don’t know what you mean” Adena responds, brow furrowed 

 

“You’re afraid of me Adena!” Kat says 

 

“Kat…” 

 

“No. Don’t. You won’t touch me, you don’t kiss me like you used to, Jesus Adena we haven’t had sex in weeks and…” Kat hesitates, chest heaving, out of breath “And you keep looking at me like… like my parents did. Like I’m broken” A tear falls down her face 

 

There is a pause, Adena is trying to find the words. She cares for Kat so deeply, and she knows the things she is saying are true. 

 

“Kat I was so scared,” Adena says, looking down, very unlike her 

 

“I am fine Adena!” Kat responds 

 

“I didn’t know what to think Kat, one second we were making love, and the next you were…” Adena stops 

 

“I was what Adena?” Kat pushes 

 

“You...weren’t ok,” She says softly 

 

“I have a heart condition Adena, we’ve talked about this” Kat responds 

 

“You didn’t tell me that happens,” Adena says 

 

“Would that have changed things?” Kat says, growing more and more upset

 

“It would have been nice to know,” Adena says, just above a whisper 

 

“You told me I was safe with you, that it doesn’t matter,” Kat says, tears forming 

 

“It doesn’t” Adena responds, finally looking up 

 

“Clearly it does,” Kat says looking into her eyes “Because you have that same sad look in your eyes that everyone else did Adena” 

 

Kat starts to gather her things 

 

“No, Kat we don’t run. We need to talk about this” Adena pleads 

 

“I have nothing else to say,” Kat says, tears now flowing fully 

 

“Please don’t go,” Adena thought Kat was angry, but the realization she is hurt causes tears to fall from Adena as well 

 

Kat reaches the door and turns the knob, she pauses and turns to Adena. 

 

“I thought you were different,” She says before leaving 

 

Adena breaks down, tears turning to sobs. Kat was right, this whole time she was afraid, afraid to hurt Kat, scared to break her. But she didn’t realize that keeping her distance was breaking her anyway. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here's another chapter for everyone. Thank you all so much for the feedback. I am hoping to keep this up for a few more chapters. Make sure to follow me on tumblr @threeboldladies. I take requests!


	5. Insecurity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat goes to the girls

“Are you expecting someone?” Jane says, walking out of her bedroom at the sound of knocking 

“No” Sutton says looking up from her magazine 

The two walk towards the door and open it to see a flustered Kat. 

“Kat what’s…”

“She’s scared of me!” Kat chokes out walking into the living room 

“Who?” Sutton questions, walking to the kitchen for wine 

“Adena” Kat says catching her breath, it’s clear she ran here 

“Ok babe calm down, breathe. You’re not supposed to get worked up like this” Jane says sitting next to her, and rubbing circles on her back 

“What do you mean she’s scared of you?” Sutton asks handing her the glass of rose and sitting on her other side 

“It’s been weeks, and she won’t touch me, she’s afraid it will happen again. And I can’t take it, and I need her to touch me” Kat spills out 

“Woah woah woah. Kat, please slow down. Breathe” Jane soothes 

“So something changed after the hospital?” Sutton asks 

“Yeah, she just has gotten weird and… and distant. It’s like she’s on edge all the time. And she gives me these eyes. These sad eyes like I am a victim or something” Kat says taking a big sip of her wine 

“I am sure the whole situation just freaked her out a bit” Jane suggests 

“Yeah I mean you had heart palpitations during sex...that's kind of a lot Kitty” Sutton adds 

“I know it is. But...but when I told her about my past, and the surgery and everything she just made me feel so safe. When this has come up with people in the past they get weird, but she didn’t. She was so good about it. Then this happens, and it’s like she is not different than anyone else” Kat says with a sigh 

“Maybe she just needs time,” Jane says 

“It’s been weeks and she won’t even kiss me more than a peck” Kat responds immediately 

“Adena cares about you Kat,” Sutton says grabbing her hand 

“I know she does, but she is just making me feel really...insecure,” Kat says looking down 

Jane and Sutton look to each other, shocked by their friend's uncharacteristic vulnerability. 

“Kat, you need to talk to her about this” Sutton says 

“I tried” Kat interjects 

“You told her how this makes you feel?” Jane presses 

“Well...I... I told her she was treating me differently” Kat says 

“And did you tell her that makes you insecure?” Sutton says 

“...no...I got upset and came here” Kat says, embarrassed

“Kat…” Jane starts 

“I know ok...I know I should face this but I just don’t know how...I need time” Kat says 

“You can stay here tonight babe, but you are going to have to face this if you want you guys to last,” Sutton says 

“Thank you guys,” Kat says before being sandwiched between the two in a hug. 

Late that night she lies awake on Sutton and Jane’s couch, her phone lights up with a text from Adena. 

>>> I know you’re upset, but please Kat, I need to know you are safe 

Kat is upset. She is angry and confused, and scared. But Kat is not spiteful 

<<< I am ok. We can talk more soon. 

Kat doesn’t sleep a wink. She lies awake remembering Adena's soft hands wrapped around her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for all your comments. I am so grateful for all the love this little series has been recieving. Make sure to follow me on tumblr @threeboldladies. I take requests!


	6. More than Anything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat and Adena talk it out

Kat stayed at the girls' apartment for breakfast. They didn’t talk about her and Adena which she was grateful for. The conversation was light, and unimportant- music, gossip, boys. Kat couldn’t help but look to her phone, hoping for a text from Adena...nothing. 

“Babe I think this one needs to be solved face to face,” Sutton says to Kat, who is staring at her screen with furrowed brows. 

“I...I know” Kat says with uncertainty 

“I know this isn’t something you’ve ever done. I know feelings are scary, but you want this to work right?” Jane questions 

“More than anything,” Kat says quietly 

Sutton can’t help her smile “Go to talk to her” 

 

\- - - - - - - - - -

Kat takes the long way back the apartment, practicing what she wants to say. She lingers outside the front of her building for a few minutes before working up the courage to climb the stairs. She reaches her door, takes a breath, and walks in. Adena is sitting on the couch. It’s clear from her eyes that she had been crying, and when she looks over to Kat, Kat’s heart cracks slightly. 

“Hi,” Kat says softly 

“Hello” Adena responds 

Kat lingers a bit, playing with her hands, and avoiding eye contact. She takes a breath. 

“I think...I think we should talk more about all of this” Kat says looking away from Adena’s gaze 

“I agree,” Adena says moving over to make room for Kat on the couch. 

Kat practiced what she wants to say, but in this moment she can’t seem to find her words, not in the way she wants. 

“I want this to work...I want us to work” Kat says 

“I do too” Adena adds immediately

“But Adena… you made me feel really...really awful” Kat says, voice wavering 

Adena holds back her tears, that is exactly what she didn’t want to do. 

“You know I don’t do relationships, I don’t open up to people,” Kat says 

“I know you don’t, and I was so happy that you opened up to me,” Adena says trying to find Kat’s eyes 

“I was vulnerable with you in a really difficult way. You made me feel so...so seen, and comfortable. But then everything happened, and I was in the hospital, and you changed. You started acting differently and treating me differently. It was like the rug was ripped out from under me” Kat finishes, looking down to her hands 

Adena is stunned. Never is Kat this open and honest, and never has it hurt her so profoundly. 

“I am sorry. You are right, I have been distant. I know that I have been treating you differently.” Adena says 

Kat finally looks up to her “You have made me feel really insecure...like I am unwanted” 

“Oh, Kat. I am so sorry. I want you Kat, I do.” Adena feels a sharp pain in her heart “The truth is that I have been scared. Scared that it would happen again. Scared that I might lose you, and scared that I would be the reason why” Adena says, wiping a stray tear 

“You thought it was your fault?” Kat says, stunned.

All Adena can do is nod, and wipe away her tears, flowing freely now 

“Adena” Kat says looking her in the eyes “It was not your fault. It just happens ok. It could happen when I am going for a run, or really stressed...or having sex. You did nothing” 

“I was so fucking scared,” Adena says through tears. Hearing Adena swear takes Kat by surprise

“Adena…”

“I can’t stop thinking about it. About being on top of you one second, and calling an ambulance the next. I can’t lose you Kat” Adena cries 

“Hey.” Kat movies closer, grabbing Adena’s face “I am not going anywhere ok? You’re stuck with me” 

Adena gives Kat a weak smile. 

“I know this was scary, but you can’t hold on to that fear. That’s no way to live. That’s no way to make a relationship last. I want this to work Adena, but you need to stop thinking I am so fragile” Kat says, rubbing her thumbs along Adena’s cheek 

“You’re right. I am sorry” Adena says, resting her head on Kat’s chest. 

Kat holds her close, it’s the most contact they have had in weeks. 

“Come on,” Kat says standing, reaching out her hand. 

Kat leads Adena to bed and wraps herself around her. Adena is still tentative, holding her loosely, without the usual abandonment, but this is a start. 

“I’m sorry” Adena keeps repeating in a whisper. 

“Shh” Kat hums, rubbing her back

The two fall asleep in the daylight, tired from their sleepless nights alone. It isn’t perfect. Kat knows Adena still needs time, but right now they are in each other's arms, and Kat once again feels safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The love I have been getting on this series is overwhelming! Thank you all so much. Please make sure to follow my tumblr @threeboldladies. Send me ideas, prompts, requests, or just come say hi!


	7. Tonight is the night

It had been almost 2 more weeks, and there had been progress. Adena had started kissing with more passion, and holding Kat closer, firmer, but still, they hadn’t had sex. Kat understood Adena’s hesitation, but at the same time, she needed this. The two are very physical people, and the lack of touch in their relationship this past month was wearing Kat down. She needed Adena, she needed that release. 

All day at work Kat couldn’t help but think “tonight is the night”. She came home to an empty apartment, Adena was staying late at the studio. Kat ordered dinner and lit candles. She threw on a comfortable outfit, but underneath was her favorite lace underwear set, the one that made Adena’s eyes light up. She put on the playlist she made for Adena and sat at the table waiting. 

“Hello beautiful,” Adena said as she stepped through the door. 

Kat stood up and walked towards her, taking her camera bag off her shoulder, and pulling her in for a passionate kiss. Kat was content to skip the meal altogether, to take Adena to the bedroom and show her all the ways she had missed her, but Adena pulls away. 

“Something smells good,” Adena says with a smile 

“I got takeout from that tapas place you love” Kat responds, pulling out a chair for Adena 

“What’s the occasion?” Adena asks, raising an eyebrow 

“Does there have to be an occasion to treat my girlfriend to a nice meal?” Kat responds 

“Well, aren’t I lucky?” Adena says, placing a quick peck on Kat’s lips before sitting down 

Dinner is delicious, and the conversation is light. They talk about their days, and what’s going on in the world. It is simple and comfortable, but Kat’s mind is wandering. She wants Adena. No, she needs her. They finish their meal, and Adena stands to clean up. Kat wraps her arms around her waist from behind and places a kiss on her neck. 

“Leave it. I have some plans for dessert” Kat jokes, her voice low, and wanton. 

Adena turns in her arms and looks into her eyes. She is nervous but hides it well. 

“What are these plans?” Adena questions biting her lip 

“I could tell you” Kat says, placing a kiss to her jaw “Or I could show you” She pulls her in 

Their lips collide, and they walk clumsily towards the bed, losing articles of clothing on the way. Kat pushes Adena on to the bed. Adena looks her up and down, getting that sparkle in her eye at the sight of Kat’s lingerie. Kat climbs onto the bed, straddling Adena, kissing her neck, down to her chest, leaving love marks on her way. Adena pulls Kat to her lips, and rolls them over, switching their positions. Kat has a devious smile on her face, and Adena wipes it off by pulling her in for a sloppy kiss. 

“God...Adena” Kat moans as the older woman kisses her neck, sucking on the pulse point 

Adena smiles against her, and keeps trailing kisses down the woman. Kat’s breath hitches as Adena reaches the sensitive skin of her lower abdomen. Adena immediately stops, and looks to Kat with fear in her eyes. 

“Don’t stop” Kat moans. 

“Kat...I...I” Adena struggles, suddenly overcome with fear. 

Kat opens her eyes, and looks down to Adena, who was moving off of her. 

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Kat questions. The way Kat had lost her breath brought everything back to Adena 

“I...I” Adena stutters 

“What?” Kat presses, unable to mask her frustration

“Kat I don’t think I can” Adena says, turning away from her. 

Kat rises from the bed and begins to get dressed 

“I’m sorry. It’s just...I”

“Don’t” Kat says holding up her hand, stopping her “I don’t have it in me” she says sadly.

“Where are you going?” Adena pleads as Kat finishes putting her clothes on, and grabs her keys and phone 

“I need some air” Kat responds, heading for the door 

“Please Kat, don’t go. I’m sorry” Adena says, tears streaming down her face 

Kat doesn’t respond, she leaves the apartment, and begins walking in no particular direction. She doesn’t know what she is feeling, but she knows it hurts. The cold air slaps against her face as she moves aimlessly through the night. She doesn’t know where she is going from here, on this walk, or with Adena.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Again, thank you all so much for the support on this series, it has been amazing. Make sure to follow my Tumblr @threeboldladies, and come say hi or send prompts.


	8. Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat confronts the issue

Kat’s walk has turned into a marathon, and her feet are starting to hurt. Each bar she passes she thinks of how easy it would be to go in and find someone to take away the ache between her legs, but then she shakes the thought away, and feels sick for even having it. She doesn’t want to go to the girls apartment, or talk to anyone because she doesn’t want to admit out loud what is eating at her- Adena and her are not ok, and she is scared they never will be. 

Kat walks for what feels like days until the streets are again familiar, and suddenly she is staring up at her apartment. She doesn’t feel ready to face this. The thought of losing Adena is clawing at her chest, and the three words she has always been too afraid to say are swirling through her mind. She waits for a while, and then makes the slow ascent to her apartment. 

She walks in to the sight of Adena hunched over on the sofa, head in her hands, crying. It is too much for Kat. Way too much. She doesn’t say anything, and walks to the bathroom. When she looks in the mirror, it takes everything inside her to fight the tears forming, and wipe off her makeup. She follows her nightly routine, and quietly gets into bed. The layout of Kat’s apartment doesn’t allow for any separation, and the two sit in silence. Kat in the bed. Adena on the couch. 

The quiet is cutting. So many questions and feelings are running through Kat’s head, she feels herself unraveling. Adena is usually there to hold her when she gets like this, to kiss away the worry, and make her feel safe, but not this time. This time it’s Adena who is making her feel this way. Suddenly the silence is too much. 

“Do you still want me?” Kat says, barely above a whisper. 

Adena feels her heart breaking. The question causing a pain so profound her breath catches. She walks slowly to the bed, sitting on the edge, begging for Kat to look her in the eyes. 

“Of course I want you” Adena says, tears falling 

Kat doesn’t look up, she pulls the blanket close to her, needing any comfort she can get. 

“Are you still attracted to me?” Kat asks, afraid of the answer.

“Kat..” Adena starts, stunned by the question “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I am so attracted to you.” she says, trying to reassure Kat as best she can 

“It feels like…” Kat starts, looking up slightly “nevermind” 

“Kat please” Adena says, begging for her to open up 

“That isn’t how it feels. It...It feels like you don’t want me to be your girlfriend anymore” Kat admits, playing with the comforter out of nervousness 

If Adena’s heart wasn’t broken before, it is shattered now. 

“Kat. I am so sorry. That isn’t at all how I feel.” Adena says, looking Kat in the eyes so she knows it’s true 

“I don’t know where to go from here.” Kat says softly. 

“I am trying so hard to get over it Kat, I am.” Adena responds 

“I miss feeling close to you. I miss being with you. I need it Adena” Kat says 

“I know” Adena breathes out 

“I can’t keep waiting. Hoping every day is the day my girlfriend will finally want to sleep with me again” Kat says, sitting up to face her 

“What are you saying?” Adena questions, eyes filling with tears 

“Maybe you need some space. Some time” Kat says quietly 

“Are you breaking up with me?” Adena responds, pain written all over her face 

“I want to be with you Adena. So badly. I care about you more than you know, but the way things have been going these weeks…” 

“Kat I can’t lose you” Adena cuts in, grabbing her hand tightly, scared 

“I don’t want to lose you either Adena, but we aren’t ok and we both know it. You have things you need to deal with” Kat responds 

“I can’t lose you” Adena says again 

“If we keep going the way we are you will. I am going to give you the room you need to figure all of this out.” Kat says quietly

“I am so sorry Kat. I am so sorry” Adena cries, doubling over, placing her head in the blanket. 

Kat instinctively moves to comfort her, rubbing her back. Adena cries, and Kat holds her silently.  
Kat still doesn’t know where she is going, but she knows that she loves the woman in her arms, and says a silent prayer they will find their way back together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heres another chapter! Make sure to follow my tumblr @threeboldladies. Come say hi or send prompts!


	9. Release

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kat gets a knock at her door

It has been a month, but it Kat is honest it feels so much longer. She hasn’t been able to sleep comfortably without Adena’s arms around her, and her apartment feels tainted with memories. She has gone to bars, flirted, danced, but nothing further. Every time she feels things approaching that invisible line she gets a knot in her stomach, and leaves. 

It has been a month, and Adena feels like it has been so much longer. She hasn’t been eating normal or producing work. All her thoughts lead to Kat, to retracing every inch of her face, and remembering her infectious laugh. She has thought of calling Kat hundreds of times, but she knew she wasn’t ready, and it wouldn’t be fair to her. 

\------ 

It’s late, Kat is on the couch with a cup of tea and her laptop. She is in a loose sweatshirt, and sweatpants, and her glasses, a kind of uniform for this past month. Suddenly there is a knock at her door. 

“Coming” She yells heading through her kitchen. 

She opens the door, and all the air is ripped from her lungs. Adena is standing in front of her, in a dark red hijab, and Kat’s favorite jumpsuit. 

“How did you….what are you…” Kat starts 

“I still have my key” Adena says softly, her accent running through Kat like a ghost 

“Why are you here?” Kat says softly, eyes darting everywhere but Adena’s piercing eyes 

“I needed to see you Kat” Adena responds. 

Kat moves to the side, letting Adena into the apartment. Adena enters a bit before turning back to Kat. 

“Kat I don’t want to do this break anymore,” She says bluntly as if she had been holding in a breath for days 

Kat is clearly stunned, she knows she misses this woman, loves this woman, but she can’t go back to the way things were. 

“I don’t know what has changed” Kat responds. 

“I have changed. I have spent this whole month trying to be okay, but I can’t because I realized that I will never be okay if you aren’t a part of my life” Adena says, voice wavering with emotion

“I want you in my life too Adena, but are you over…” Kat trails off, and Adena knows what she means 

Adena moves into Kat’s space, and places a hand on her cheek, forcing her to look into her eyes. 

“I want you, Kat. I was afraid of losing you or hurting you. You were right. Everything you said was right. I didn’t want to break you, and I am sorry for treating you like you were something so easily broken. But Kat I am not afraid anymore, what I was doing caused me to lose you anyway, and...and I can’t do that” Adena says, a tear falling down her face. 

Kat instinctively moves and wipes the tear away. 

“So what are you saying?” Kat questions. 

“I want you back Kat. If you will have me. I want you back, and I never want to let go” Adena confesses 

"I...I want you back Adena, I need you to be in my life," Kat says, voice shaking

“There is one more thing,” Adena says softly. 

Kat looks up to her questioningly 

“I love you Kat Edison. I am in love with you” Adena smiles. She hears Kats breath be taken away, and this time she isn’t scared 

It takes a moment for Kat to process “I...I love you too Adena.” Kat says pulling her in for a hug “I was so afraid you wouldn’t come back” Kat admits through happy tears. 

“I will always come back for you” Adena whispers back 

Adena pulls out of the hug and brings Kat in for a bruising kiss. She steps back and reaches for Kat’s sweatshirt. 

“What are you doing?” Kat asks 

“Something I should have done a while ago” Adena smirks, pulling off the shirt, and kissing her with passion 

Distance makes the heart grow fonder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! This was a fun one to write. I am not sure where, if anywhere I will take things now. Make sure to follow me on tumblr @threeboldladies. Come say hi or share ideas!


	10. Take care of her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kadena has been back together for a little while, and Kat thinks it's time that Adena meets the parents.

~2 months later~ 

 

There’s a look that Kat gets in her eyes when her heart does a little backflip. The color drains from her face, her pupils dilate, and her breath catches.  Adena knows now what it is and what it means... 

 

“And I think that Firuze has some meetings lined up for me for the next few weeks to find gallery spaces….” she trails off as this look enters Kat’s eyes “Kat baby breathe for me, you’re fine okay? In and out. It will stop” she says soothingly, no longer scared of these minor episodes 

 

She watches Kat do her breathing exercise and return back to their corner table in their favorite cafe. The subtle red blush of Kat’s cheeks returns to her face, and she gives Adena a little nod, the ok, she is fine and Adena can continue. 

 

“Ok, so these galleries….”

 

“Do you want to meet my parents?” Kat cuts in abruptly

 

“...I would...love to” Adena says, hesitating a bit as this proposition seemed to come out of nowhere 

 

“Really? I mean...we’ve been together for a bit now, and I know that this is serious, and I want you to meet them, and talk with them, and get to know them, and hopefully like them” Kat begins to ramble, and Adena quickly realizes this was the stressor that caused her heart to race. 

 

“Babe...breathe,” Adena says, taking Kat’s hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze “I would very much like to meet the people who made this beautiful woman I love so much” 

 

Kat blushes “You know I have never done this...the whole ‘meet the parents’ thing,” she says “but I don’t know...this feels right to me.”

 

“It feels right to me too joonam” Adena smiles. Kat doesn’t often express it in words, but gestures like this constantly show Adena that she is in this with her for the long haul “Invite them over for dinner, I’ll cook!”

 

\---------

 

It wasn’t too long after that Susan and Marcus were set to come for a dinner. Kat, of course, stressed constantly. She needed this to be perfect, to go well. She knows how protective her parents are, and just hope Adena can live up to their standards. 

 

There is a knock on the door, and Kat tenses up. Adena crosses the gap between them and rubs her hand up and down the woman's shoulders 

“Everything is going to be okay my love. I promise you” Adena says, kissing her forehead before opening the door. 

 

Adena is met with the warm smiles of Kat’s parents 

 

“Mr. and Mrs. Edison, it is so nice to finally meet you both” Adena smiles, reaching out her hands 

 

“Oh please, don’t be silly” Susan smiles, pulling her in for a hug “Call me Susan” she adds warmly 

 

“And call me Marcus” Kat’s father adds, giving Adena a quick kiss on the cheek 

 

Kat is quick to move everyone to the dinner table and start the meal. Adena sees just how nervous she is, and gives her leg a reassuring squeeze under the table 

 

“You’re alright love, it’s all okay” Adena whispers, with a quick kiss on the cheek, a kind gesture that isn’t lost on the onlooking parents. 

 

The rest of the dinner goes by with a flood of questions and small talk. To every tough question, Adena rises with grace, answering to the best of her abilities, trying to prove how much she loves Kat, and how much she is willing to do to keep her in her life. There are exchanged glances between the parents wherein the silently communicate  _ we like this girl.  _

 

When dinner is finished, Kat and her mom busy themselves with cleanup and gossip, their laughter filling the apartment, and making Adena’s heart warm. Marcus takes advantage of this time to sit down with his daughter’s girlfriend one on one. 

 

“Now, you know I have to say this to you because I’m her father, but if you hurt that little girl of mine…”

 

“I don’t intend on ever hurting her sir” Adena cuts in “I plan on sharing my life with your daughter, the good times, and the bad. I promise to fight for her, protect her, love her with ferocity, and cherish her with care” She says, maintaining eye contact so he knows she means it 

 

Marcus is quiet for a moment “I appreciate that very much Adena, you seem like quite the remarkable young lady, I see now why she is so taken with you” 

 

Adena smiles, looking over to Kat and her mother, catching a glimpse of Kat’s gorgeous smile. 

 

“I am very taken by her as well,” she says shyly 

 

“And I know you know of her health troubles” Marcus starts

Adena feels herself tense slightly, still ashamed with the way she handled them in the past 

 

“Take care of her,” he says, stressing every syllable “There will be times when she will fight it, but she needs it” he adds and Adena nods in agreement 

  
  


\------

 

“So I decided on a small space in Harlem, it’s very quirky and right by….” Adena trails off “Hey babe, take your breaths. Give it a second” She says looking to Kat 

 

The color returns and the usual nod of approval is given by Kat. 

 

“Everything okay?” Adena questions 

 

“A-okay my love” Kat responds, taking a sip of her coffee, and resting her head on her hand so she can listen to Adena talk about her newest installment. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. It has been a minute. I wanted to add a chapter now that I am finally done with this semester. I hope everyone likes where I took this. Please let me know if you have any ideas about where to go from here, or if you have any requests outside of this. Make sure to follow me on Tumblr @threeboldladies. Send requests, or just say hi!


	11. I've got you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After introducing Adena to her parents, Kat wants to know a little bit more about Adena's.

It’s a usual night for Kat and Adena. The coffee table is littered with takeout boxes, and the two are tangled together underneath a blanket. They had settled on a documentary on Frida Kahlo that Adena had DVR’d on Kat’s TV. Adena was enthralled with the show, and aimlessly tracing patterns on Kat’s thigh. Kat was focused on a question that has been looming in her mind for the weeks since she had introduced Adena to her parents. 

Kat takes a calming breath “Dena?” she says quietly, pulling gently at the hem of her shirt 

“Mmm?” Adena responds, reaching to turn the volume down. 

“I wanted to ask you about something…” Kat says, unsure of herself. 

Adena looks over to the unsure face of her girlfriend “I’m right here, ask me anything” She responds, placing her hand over Kats to stop her fidgeting. 

“Your family?” She says, a question she doesn't fully know how to form “I...I introduced you to mine, but I don’t really know anything about yours. I really want to” Kat admits 

Adena takes a second to think about how she wants to address this. 

“Well Kat...my family, It’s very different from yours. We don’t speak regularly. Well...I call my mom when I can, but it isn’t the kind of contact you maintain with your parents.” Adena starts 

Kat doesn’t respond or interrupt. She doesn’t ask questions or make judgments. She looks into Adena’s eyes with reassurance, giving her the room she needs to open up. 

“You know I left home at a young age. It was a hard decision to leave my family, but they didn’t support me the way I needed, or frankly deserved. My father did not accept my sexuality, and living in a constant state of judgment was difficult” Adena says, her usual confidence a bit shaken 

Kat reaches out to cup her cheek “You don’t have to tell me this all at once. I don’t want to push” she says softly “I just, at some point, want to know everything about the people who made this beautiful woman that I love. The good and the bad” 

Most of the times, Kat is cautious and unconfident when sharing her feelings. But sometimes, in moments like these, they flow out of her naturally. These moments are usually times when Kat rises to meet Adena...to support her and make her feel safe the way Adena has since day one. 

“Baby...thank you” Adena says quietly, eyes a bit glossy from Kat’s kind words “I promise to share with you what I can...in due time. For now, know that many memories of my past are painful, and it is because of times when I needed the support system of parents, and mine weren’t there to catch me” she adds.   
Kat sits up, and pulls Adena into her, wrapping her in a hug, as if to provide this comfort and support she so often craved. 

“I've got you” Kat whispers in her ear, and Adena knows just what she means.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! It's been a bit since I added to this, but I had some time and decided to write this chapter. If you have thoughts or ideas on this story or others feel free to reach out to me on tumblr @threeboldladies . Thank you for reading!


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